Maturity in Waiting

I drove my mom to the airport today so she could fly far, far away home (sniff, sniff).  It was a long morning, starting at 5:30 AM, when my son woke me up to go potty (him, not me).  I’m not complaining about that, by the way, this kid may have been a lot of trouble to get cooking and to STAY cooking (I had severe pre-term labor with him), but my payback has been potty-training.  He’s a flippin’ wunderkind with it!  Anyway, stood in the shower by 6 AM, just letting the hot water hit my face.  Skipped the mandatory follicle-check-leg-shave because the room is really dark and they never even touch my legs anyway.  And left for my THIRD follie-check appointment in 3 days.

It’s a 45 minute drive to the RE, that’s when it’s not rush hour.  My mom came for her visit on Friday, so out of the 6 days she was here, 3 of them were spent traveling back and forth with me to the RE.  Thankfully, she didn’t care…and she watched my son while I went to my appointments (not in the lobby, I’m not a fan of bringing kids into the RE’s office, I think it’s just mean).  She says she didn’t care that most of her visit was taken up with all this TTC junk, and I hope she was telling the truth.  Like I’ve mentioned on here before, my mom was an IFer, too.

So, I get back to the RE lobby, and pick up the same magazine I was reading yesterday so I can finish the article on ‘Dressing to Look 10 Pounds Lighter’.  See I only got about half-way through yesterday, leaving me 5 pounds leaner at best, but was surprisingly called back right away.  I got the MEAN  u/s tech today…big bummer.  Maybe she needs a hug.  When I winced as she poked around with the magic wand like she was driving a stick shift for the Daytona 500, she said, “Well, it’s because your uterus goes straight back”. 

So sorry that my naughty uterus is interfering with your day. 

I think the next time I go in, if I get her, I’m going to give her an enormous bear hug!  And maybe a smooch on the cheek (after my magic wand prodding, of course).  Lonely, bitter people sometimes just need that.

Anyway, talked to my super-nice nurse who said my follicles FINALLY look like we’re in business.  One is completely mature, and one not quite.  We’ve got a 21mm and 17mm.  So I trigger tonight, and there’s nothing that makes me happier than giving myself a stomach shot.  But I really shouldn’t complain, because I’m on Ovidrel now and that’s infinitely better than the Novarell IM’s I used to do.  Ovidrel is sub-Q.  Pinch the ample supply of available skin on my belly, stick and push.  Easy as that.

So I left the office feeling good, not really optimistic per se, but good.  I’m past optimistic.  Optimistic is what you are the first few months of your first round of TTC.  How should I explain how I feel about my chances now?  Sort of like watching the recent Superbowl between the Cardinals and Steelers, I had a vested interest in watching Kurt Warner win another Superbowl, but I refused to let myself get too excited either way.  That is, until the Cardinals got a touchdown with only, what, like 5 minutes to go, to which the Steelers came back and scored AGAIN to take the lead with only a minute or so.  Well, I ended up leaving my hubby to watch the post-game interviews by himself while I pouted upstairs.  Yeah, that’s how I feel about getting preggo:  resistant to excitement, cave, and then pout unabashedly for days.  See, my ovarian follicles might be mature, but I’m pretty sure emotionally speaking,  I’m a like 12 mm at best.

So after my RE appointment, I had to drop my mom off at the airport.  We kept telling my son that grandma (whom he called ‘papa’ the whole visit because he think that’s the collective term for ‘grandparent’) was leaving, but who knows what 2 year olds understand?  Gave my mom and kiss and hug off she went to the baggage check.   I never know how much I miss my mom until we leave from a visit.  My son cried for ‘papa’ the whole ride home. 

And maybe I did a little too. 

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IComWeLeav-ers!   Welcome!  Make sure to leave me your URL so I can visit you too.  I’ve had a heckuva time getting back with all my visitors with my mom’s visit, but I’ll be on top of my game starting tomorrow.   Here’s a new question of the day?

How do (or did you) deal with hope in the 2 ww?  Sour like me?  Unrestrainedly optimistic?  Come on, spill it!!!!